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French


You Can Pass for French with Just These Gestures and Noises

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  The world thinks it knows what a French person sounds like: a derisive laugh that somehow pulls phlegm through the nostrils, a sarcastic oh-la-la between pinched puffs of smoke… But what do the French think the French sound like? And what can you say and do to pass as one of them? As part of our Fluent …

The following table will aid in communication with inanimate French objects. I have also made guides for the lesser experiences of communicating with the young and animate French, the sexually alluring French, and more.

Welcome to Verlan, France’s answer to Cockney rhyming slang or Pig Latin (and an exact parallel to Serbian’s Šatrovački). Verlan became common in the ’80s among poor young folks in Parisian suburbs, and was diffused through hip hop and pop music. Today, anyone of the MTV Europe age or younger employs it to some degree. The …

Using a pickup line in your native tongue is a dubious move. But in a foreign language the mispronounced equivalent of “Do you come here often?” can be funny, even endearing. The following are very clichéd classics; say them earnestly, falteringly, and for once your bewildered foreigner status may work in your favor. T’as des …